I Really Thought Drouin Exploded Last Night

By Trapp


Thomas Hickey laid out a monstrous hit on Jonthan Drouin last night in every sense of the word. If you were watching the Islander/Tampa game last night you got to see some shit. An absolute bomb by HedMAN, an awful Leddy goal. But, if you were Jonathan Drouin, you weren’t seeing much other stars and fuckin rainbows after Hickey’s body completely annihilated you. Drouin was damn near baby giraffe after the hit.


This isn’t stick and puck over at your local rink, don’t make that move at the blueline…ever. 

Yeaaa that Tampa/Philly OT Last Night Was Somethin Else

by Trapp

Couple games in action last night. Caught some of Mr. McDavid and Mr. Eichel’s NHL debuts. Eichel’s snipe was pretty sweet. But no highlights from last night will top the insanity of the first ever 3 on 3 overtime in now NHL history between the Tampa Bay Lightning and the Philadelphia Flyers. Back and forth action. At one point I was like laughing because how crazy it was. Take a look below to watch again or incase you missed it.

  
  

I’m Not A Genius But I’m Gonna Just Say That Kucherov Is In Tonight

By Trapp 

  
He did that to himself last game. 

Probably hurt pretty good if the yug didn’t come back to the game. I think everyone knows my opinion of Conathan Joop by now, and he’s at again with the cryptic bullshit. He’s “considerably better”. Kucherov says he’ll do warm ups and see if Jooper wants to put him… Basically he’s playing. I hope Chicago just fuckin ends it tonight and puts the Lightning away. Can’t do a game 7, don’t want it. What sucks immensely is a couple of ex Rangers will be Stanley Cup Champions this week. That one’s tough.

Killorn Was Tryna Make Moves Before Game 4 

By Trapp

  
Yesterday Sportscenter released what Lebron’s daily schedule was. Have another look at it cuz I’m sure everyone across the globe saw it:

 
Killorn ain’t about that life. He gonna go on Hinge make a couple swipes and go play for the Stanley Cup. Hinge is apparently another Tinder. He’s got New York listed as his current area despite being now in a new series with ChiTown. He was definitely schemin in the Conference Finals against New York and just never changed his city when they advanced. 

Maybe a couple swipes before game 5 will get him on the score sheet in more ways than one because he was swipin Wednesday and did this:

The Curious Case of Benjamin Bishop

by Trapp 

  
Con Jooper keeps making jokes like the shmuck he is “Hey come on he’s 6’7 it takes a long time for him to get up!” That shit isn’t really fooling anybody dude. You had 20 year old Vasilevskiy in for game 4 and was most likely shitting his pants. I personally don’t think Chicago tested him enough and it was also the worst game the Blackhawks played in the post season this year. 

Point is, there is alot of annoying speculation as to what’s wrong with Benjamin. 

Aftermath of Saad driving the net and colliding with Bishop.


Game 2 he leaves the net, comes back, leaves the net and yada yada yada fuckin circus act. A lot of people on Twitter were sharing what they think is the issue with Bishop and a lot of people chirped him for bein soft. Luongo tweeted that it could be diarrhea. I’m gonna rule that one out though even though it’s hilarious. Doud suggested to Puck Daddy and was mentioned on their podcast that it was actually Jean Claude Van Damme escaping henchmen like in Sudden Death.

  
  
I won’t rule that one out because I pray to Christ that happened in game 2 and/or has happened before period. But at the end of the day Benjamin Bish is probably dealing with a hip or groin issue. He did not partake in today’s practice and there have been multiple updates within like 20 minutes saying he’s “uncertain” for game 5 and one that he’s “hopeful” and getting better each day. This shit’s getting annoying. Which one is it? Suck it up Ben. I hope you do play tomorrow night and there are endless chirps around the net and between plays from the Hawks directed toward you. 

You won’t be the first Benjamin disliked mightily by the people of Chicago. 

Ya Know, When I Prayed for the Rangers to Win the Cup This Year, This Isn’t What I Meant.

r10s-4-web

by Doud

Literally me watching this Cup Final:

Let’s just run it all down:

CHICAGO:

-Brad Richards

-Dan Carcillo

TAMPA:

-Ryan Callahan

-Anton StralMAN

-Brian Boyle

-Johnathan Marchessault (Connecticut Whale 2011-12)

-Pat Verbeek (Assistant GM, Dir. of Player Personnel)

Granted, I was all for the Cally/Marty swap, and Richards’ play through the 2014 run did nothing but justify his benching by Torts the previous year and I was all for buying him out last summer, but still.  This is all so brutal. Cally and Rich scoring in game 3 was not cool, not cool at all.  Don’t even get me started on the fact that the Rangers literally had Stamkos back in ’09.

FUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCK

Mark Lazarus, NBC Sports Head, Can Fuck Right Off

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beardmara

Mara Beard very necessary.

by Doud

From the Chicago Tribune:

“The players won’t like this, but I wish they all would stop growing beards in the postseason,” Lazarus said. “Let’s get their faces out there. Let’s talk about how young and attractive they are. What model citizens they are. (Hockey players) truly are one of a kind among professional athletes. 

“I know it’s a tradition and superstition, but I think (the beards do) hurt recognition. They have a great opportunity with more endorsements. Or simply more recognition with fans saying, ‘That guy looks like the kid next door,’ which many of these guys do. I think that would be a nice thing.”

Ya know whats cool nowadays (and has probably jumped the shark)?  Beards.  Ya know whats always been manly as fuck?  Beards.  It’s called fashion Mark, look it up, and in hockey you simply don’t mess with tradition*.  Ken Morrow walked outta Lake Placid with gold in hand and into Nassau onto pro ice and said “fuck this shaving bullshit, I came to win.”  And unfortunately, that’s exactly what he did for 4 straight years.  Thus the full follicle tradition was born.  Seriously as the saying goes, “how do you shave your beard? YOU DON’T.”  So yea, I don’t think anyone’s about to listen to smooth faced Mark Lazarus of NBC.  Not to mention, last I checked Gillette, the best a man can get, is a long time sponsor of the League of National Hockey and I’m PRETTY sure you need facial hair in order to market such a product geared toward the removal of such.  Cross promotion BITCH, use your brain one time for me MARK.

Seriously, hockey’s a man’s game played by men, other than Sidney Crosby.

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Hit puberty sometime before age 30 bro honestly.

*EXCEPTION: ’94 Rangers, ‘cuz Mess told his troops he aint partaking in any Islander bullshit.