Getzlaf Says ‘Fuck Bosley’ for More Immediate Results


By Trapp

Getzlaf answered questions from the media after the morning skate wearin this road kill on his head.

It’s no secret the damn guy is bald. He was workin with a little bit of stragglers on his melon for a while but that can only go on for so long. There’s no doubt in my mind he is ripped apart by opposing players for being bald at any chance they get. 

If we see Getzlaf put up 6 assists in game 3 and he happens to be wearing this piece; he has no choice but to wear it for the remainder of the post season. 

Tonight’s Schedule and Fike Misher


By Trapp

Possible series clinchers tonight with Chicago and Calgary. Going to be another very exciting night of playoff hockey. 

Nashville’s only hope is if Carrie Underwood is present tonight. Also Fike Misher is in the same category as Dan Girardi for strong as fuck faces. 


Gib waj.

I Know Of Only Two People Named Corban

By Trapp

The first person I know of named Corban is Corban Dallas from the Luc Besson sci-fi movie the Fifth Element starring Bruce Willis, Gary Oldman and this chick…

The other Corban I know of is Flames rookie with a remarkable full name: Corban Knight. I found out this guy existed like literally 13 minutes ago because he scored his first goal in the National last night against the Ducks which ended up being a 7-2 routing in favor of Corban. You know who didn’t care that it was Corban’s first gino in the show? The ref.

Ref’s like “Yo, here.”


By Trapp


Big Hoss can pretty much say “the last 24 hours have been really exciting…”

Two goals last night in the OT loss to Calgary and he’s already got a goal tonight against Torts-less Canucks. The yugs gettin older now at the age of 35 but it doesn’t matter. Every shift Hossa is out there he is effective.

51 games played this season, 23 goals and 22 assists is pretty damn solid for a yug who’s 35. He’s quietly closing in on 1,000 points as he sits with 980…

Knibb High Football Rules.

Kari Lehtonen Gives No Shits


by Doud

Dallas pretty much took a dump on Calgary last night and servedd them their pancakes with Seguin puttin up a 4 spot in the G column, (didnt take his cock out like Thornton would though), Bamie Jenn rackin up 5 apples as well as a dope goal himself and Kari stopping 25 shots. They pretty much hit the Easy button and mailed that one in, and Kari got bored like Prince and sat his fat ass on the net to end the road rout because that’s what he does. Trolling the Flames in grand fashion.

I wonder if the Stars challenged the Flames to a game of basketball late night after everyone left the Saddledome.

NHL LOOK ALIKES: Jay Feaster and Lars Von Trier

By Trapp

Today’s edition of NHL Look Alikes we got a mediocre at best General Manager in Jay Feaster and the eccentric Danish Director who is not afraid to cross boundaries with his films.


Both these yugs get criticized to the max for the their work they do/don’t do. Feaster won a cup wit Tampa and hasn’t done shit with CalCity except bring back players for multiple tours on the team aka Mikey Cams and Alex Tanguay.

Shift gears a little bit. Lars Von Trier is a director from Denmark. He makes art house films and uses main stream actors and actress’ like Shia LeBouf, Willem Dafoe and Kirsten Dunst and puts them outside of their comfortzone. Just go check out the trailers for the Antichrist and Nymphomaniac.

That’s Right, And It’s The Choice Of A New Generation