Getzlaf Says ‘Fuck Bosley’ for More Immediate Results


By Trapp

Getzlaf answered questions from the media after the morning skate wearin this road kill on his head.

It’s no secret the damn guy is bald. He was workin with a little bit of stragglers on his melon for a while but that can only go on for so long. There’s no doubt in my mind he is ripped apart by opposing players for being bald at any chance they get. 

If we see Getzlaf put up 6 assists in game 3 and he happens to be wearing this piece; he has no choice but to wear it for the remainder of the post season. 

I Know Of Only Two People Named Corban

By Trapp

The first person I know of named Corban is Corban Dallas from the Luc Besson sci-fi movie the Fifth Element starring Bruce Willis, Gary Oldman and this chick…

The other Corban I know of is Flames rookie with a remarkable full name: Corban Knight. I found out this guy existed like literally 13 minutes ago because he scored his first goal in the National last night against the Ducks which ended up being a 7-2 routing in favor of Corban. You know who didn’t care that it was Corban’s first gino in the show? The ref.

Ref’s like “Yo, here.”

Pustin Denner Traded On National Pancake Day. Can’t Make This Shit Up



By Doud

How do you celebrate National Pancake day? By trading a dude that once legit jacked himself up while crushin ‘cakes. You make that move 100 times out of 100. Its just proper asset management, you don’t need a dude on your roster liable to blow out an ACL or some shit while running to IHOP. Throw on top of it the trade deadline is is tomorrow, Penner is an impending UFA and DC is on the other side of the continent and yea no shit this was the first domino to fall on the NHL transaction wire this morning.

Dodger Stadium Game Will Be Radest Game In NHL History


By Doud


There’s  goddamn volleyball court in left field.  What the hell else do I have to say about this.

Well, how bout this, from the NHL’s casting manager:

“We are looking for 40- 60 people to fill the following roles: Walkers/ Joggers; In-line Skaters; Skateboarders; Bikers (riding regular bikes – no tricks). They will bring their own bike to game day.”

“We are trying to create a Venice Beach atmosphere. Age minimum is 18 years old. There is no age maximum.”

“This is a volunteer position. You will be on the field during pre-game ceremonies, and both intermissions. During intermissions Kiss and Five For Fighting will be playing on the field. During the game you will be watching the game in a holding area where a meal and drinks will be served. You will not receive tickets to the game.”

You are OUTSIDE YOUR MIND if you don’t think I’m going to LA to be a volunteer jogger or biker for this event.  Gonna do it big too with a headband, long ass socks and inappropriately short shorts.  Also I’m a phenomenal women’s volleyball judge so yea I’ll just assume that position’s already mine.

As for the roller hockey rink on home plate, the NHL is flat out stupid if they don’t have a Pro Beach Hockey reunion tournament which I would pay obscene amounts of American currency to view.  Dawg Pac all day son




By Trapp

Last night 10/28/13 marked a special night in hockey. Lindy Ruff now the coach of the Dallas Stars played his first game in Buffalo as an opposing coach for the first time in 14 years. That’s pretty special stuff to coach a team for that long, it’s unfortunate the yug never got to win the Stanley Cup all those years in BuffNation. Also in that game tonight was the debut of Matt Moulson who was acquired yesterday by the Buffalo Sabres from the New York Islanders in exchange for Thomas Vanek. Islanders gave up a good amount to get him so hopefully it pays off for them. Matt Moulson was a well liked guy in that lockerroom, let’s see how this affects the team and overall his dude Johnny Tavs.

7777136-300x3948-3-11 Matt Moulson signing 020
Moulson scored two damn goals in his debut for Buff tonight. Doesn’t really matter because he’ll be dealt at the deadline, maybe even sooner.

Tonight was also the home opener for the New York Rangers against the Montreal Canadiens. This comes after a 9 game road trip which was pretty much a nightmare for the team and fans. After the first period I gave the edge to the Rangers but the officiating took over the game for a couple questionable calls. Won’t get into great detail but apparently Brian Boyle should’ve just allowed the opposing player to skate gingerly through the neutral zone instead of bodying him up? And also Chris Kreider shouldn’t make attempts to stay onside just go offside? Regardless the Rangers ended up losing the game 2-0.

In other news: Chicago beat the shit out of Minnesota again, Canucks won, Saku Koivu probably has a concussion after the Brandon DubDub hit which was clean by the way, Robbie Scuds has a broken ankle and will miss a shit ton of time from the Penguin lineup, Hanzal is suspended again, Vanek will play for the Islanders tonight and Carl Hagelin will play for the Rangers tonight.

Tonight’s games:

Rangers Starting To Get To This Point…

By Doud

Game was over the second Getzlaf took a sick pass from Perry and one-timed it passed Hank for the 1-0 lead. Stupid ass Joe on the telecast would have you believe that it was simply a sick move by Perry but how bout look at the actual play bro: 0 defensive zone coverage. For a system that’s supposedly man on man in your own zone both offenders not only went unmolested but the boys in white were grossly out of position, and have been in all four matches in the early goings here. Girardi and McDonagh look pedestrian at best thus far. Del Zotto looks no different and that’s not a compliment. Maybe playin golf and chillin on the beach wasn’t the best way to go about training camp and the early part of the season, just a thought.
Alain better figure shit out fast.

Patrick Roy May Or May Not Have A Temper


By Doud

Well that didn’t take long. One night in and Roy’s just doin what he does and wildly flyin off the handle. Apparently it was in response to Ben Lovejoy goin knee on knee to first overall pick Nathan MacKinnon playing in his first NHL game after putting up two sick apples, so rightfully so, but CHRIST bro lets not almost give the camera dude a concussion how bout.
Patty Roy doesn’t give a FUCK and that’s why he’s already won the Adams trophy in my book. Playin for a dude who’s that intense on night 1 has got to make you wanna run through a wall and tear boards down.