Mr. Nash wants a high five from Doud

  

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The Game Needs More Head

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by Doud
Everyone loves good head.  Gotta have it, especially late at night. To deny anyone head means you’re either a huge loser, or a giant prude or both.  Gary BettMAN needs to do the right thing and give head to the NHL.  Give me a good reason why Andrew Shaw’s awesome header should be illegal.  You can’t.  Marcus Kruger eventually scored in the third extra frame to legally win it for Chi-Town but it could have been over much earlier in the night because nobody likes a good session to go on for too long. 

Washed Up Wednesday: Mike Watt

by Trapp

  
Mike Watt

Mike fuckin watt.

I remember religiously proclaiming this guys last name as a kid any time I heard it on the TV during a game. WATT!!! Not an extensive NHL resumè. He broke over 150 games in the show with 4 different teams. Mike wasn’t known for lighting the lamp either with 15 goals and 26 assists for a career total of 41 points. 

  

Cockbab Gettin Paid, Gettin Paid

By Trapp

Mike Babcock, Head Coach of Toronto Maple Leafs


You’re lookin at the new head coach of the 2014-2015 laughing stock of the NHL: Toronto Maple Leafs

Buff Sabes and his now former Detroit squad were in the running, but eventually pulled out. Toronto threw an absurd amount of money and incentives at Michael and he gladly accepted. Cockbab’s deal is 8 years at an estimated $50 Million Dollars.

I eventually see this team being a good team, Michael will influence better drafting and will attract players to wanna go to Toronto. They are still in their rebuilding mode but if I were a Leaf fan I’d be borderline aroused knowing you have the best coach in the NHL on their bench.

The Rick Nash Apologists Need To Stop

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by Doud

So last night Trapp texts me asking what the fuck is wrong with Nash and why the hell he can’t score, or do anything to take over a game.  My response is everything I wanted to write in this very article a couple weeks ago when the Rangers found themselves down 3-1 in their series against Washington, but I held off since I felt he would break through and score a big goal in that series, which he did do in game 6.  The reason is very simple: he does not have it within himself to be a winner.  He does not have it within his personality (of which I’m very sure is something he doesn’t actually have) to be a competitor.  He’s a shy Canadian “good boy” who only operates within his given coach’s game plan, and will never elevate his play to operate outside of said game plan, despite his clear offensive skill/ability/size and speed that warrants him the right to do so.  He does not grasp the idea that superstars (of which he is one) need to take it upon themselves to make the plays needed to win.

The Rangers need him to at some point realize that he’s the best player on the ice at any given time and has the ability to take control of the game, and even be selfish when need be.  When he gets a shorthanded breakaway coming in on his strong hand side, you go hard to the net with your speed and size to attempt a move on the goalie to score.  What you DON’T do is take a goddamn soft wrist shot from the faceoff circle for a possible rebound play to Jesper fuckin Fast.

Do it yourself bro, you’re reeeeaaally good.  Game 6 on Mother’s Day, he scores a huge goal powering to the net, and I let out one of the most fulfilling yells of exclamation yet, because I badly want to root for our true goal scoring star.

He’s not absolved yet because that’s just one (albeit a BIG one) of 6 goals in over 50 playoff games during his Rangers career, and I’m very sick of wanna be coaches defending his great “two-way-play.”

The thing about “two-way-play” is that it HAS TO GO TWO WAYS.  HE’S NOT A TWO WAY PLAYER IF HE’S NOT ALSO SCORING GOALS.  And don’t give me this shit how he’s working so hard to defend and throw hits and all that. He’s not making his teammates better, and he’s not going to the net like he should.  Period.  Let me remind you what philosophically Rick Nash on the Rangers represents: SUPERSTAR LEVEL GOAL SCORING.  He was acquired in the wake of the disastrous loss in the 2012 Eastern Conference Finals to the Devils in which the Rangers beat themselves because both John Tortorella coached his players into the ground and a lack of premium twine tingling.  He is the reason a couple core team members were deemed expendable in the name of much needed added offense in the form of a true power forward.

Look, Rick Nash is a bonafide superstar, as noted by his career high goal scoring tallys this year (42).  He’s not employed to backcheck. He could very well score tonight in game 3 in Tampa and lead the Rangers to victory, and, I don’t know, it would probably make some modicum of sense to have your 40 goal scorer on the first power play unit (looking at you Alain).  But he can’t shy away from these big moments, nor can he feel like one is enough.  He needs to grow a personality quick and start to take over.

Jagr Retires from International Hockey

  

By The Beacon

The master of flow himself, Jaromir Jagr, has announced that his time playing for the Czech Republic National team is at an end. He had stated that it’s time for younger Czechs come on board and play for the team to lead them to future victories. It is sad to think about an Olympics without Jagr. But all good things must come to an end.

Don’t worry folks. This doesn’t mean that his NHL career is done. He wants to play until he is 50. And by God I hope that happens. I support you Jaromir Jagr.