NO HOCKEY=NO LIFE

By The Beacon

About 3 weeks ago, I would have had 3-4 playoff hockey games going on right now that I would constantly switch between. But now we are down to the Stanley Cup final and I have jack shit to do tonight.

I have spent all god damn day in my “workstation” (corporate lingo for soul sucking cube) dealing with nonsense. I spent an hour on the phone with the corporate help desk talking to some Indian dude who claimed his name was Jeff. (I’m no dumb ass, Atmanan. I know your name ain’t Jeff. Just because you have 7 syllable names doesn’t mean you can be all american, choosing a 4 letter name as your work pseudonym.) Not only that but the cube is the worst possible location on the planet. Where the hell is my office with giant ass windows and shit, like Pat Bateman’s in American Psycho. Dude just did crosswords all day.

Anyway, when you work in a cube you find any possible way to pass the time. And I used to be searching any hockey related news story or details about games from the previous night. Or reading previews on match-ups that night. But with us in limbo until the cup final, I had to roam around my office building on the prowl for hot interns. Which apparently doesn’t exist in my company being that I have only seen one hot intern there and the remainder of women within the company are fat, in their 50s, or married. Or cat ladies. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR GOD DAMN CATS!

Basically the point of this post, Beer League Hockey is all there is to look forward to this week, and the potential to go bar south. Which pretty much means I will probably score some shit goal instead where I basically pass the puck to the goalie and he misses it. 

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